Blackpool gets its first 3G mobile phone network

Blackpool gets its first 3G mobile phone network

21st August 2019 Off By Tuckered

Hundreds of locals gathered along the promenade in Blackpool for the big switch-on tonight, but it wasn’t the illuminations being turned on for once.

Yes, Blackpool has finally joined the 20th century with its brand new 3G network for calls, texts and WAP browsing.

Excited resident and man of many trades including rock hawking, tarot reading and mugging, Cecil Clott said;

“Eeh it’s bootiful. A can ring our Nora wiyout having to put tuppence int box! Its lark wir int future. Lark that Trek Wars”.

A small band of locals are not happy however, as their beloved tower has essentially been turned into a giant aerial.

78 year old Mavis Milligan, known as ‘Blackpool’s cheapest thrill’ or ‘The Big One’ works daytime in an amusement arcade and delivers hand jobs at night, is planning a series of protests. She said;

“Frankly it’s a fucking disgrace. If I want to call folk I’ll use the box. They’ve ripped the fucking ball room out for this shit.”

There are no plans yet for a 4G upgrade just yet, but locals can look forward to teletext in the coming months.

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