Boris Johnson successfully negotiates no free movement of people at his bedsit in divorce settlement

Boris Johnson successfully negotiates no free movement of people at his bedsit in divorce settlement

7th September 2018 0 By Tuckered

The clown prince of cunt has been caught with his pants down again, this time to fuck the country behind his long suffering wife’s back.

They’ve announced a split after 25 years of silently mouthing ‘what the fuck’ became too much for her.

Boris and his lawyers have reportedly been working tirelessly for the last 2 years to secure a deal that pleases everyone, by writing graffiti on buses, walking out of meetings, and dancing like malfunctioning androids in Africa.

A settlement was allegedly finalised yesterday in which his wife gets to keep the house, the staff, all of the possessions, and the Harrods loyalty card.

Johnson on the other hand will rent a bedsit in East London that he has full sovereignty over, apart from the use of satellite tv, smoking indoors or keeping pets.

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