Doctor Josef Mengele appointed as the new Health Secretary

Jeremy Hunt was promoted to the role of Foreign Secretary earlier today, after Boris Johnson tendered his resignation over Brexit disagreements.

The vacancy of Foreign Secretary has been filled by Docter Josef Mengele, who has a proven track record on government driven results.

A government spokesperson said:

‘The NHS needs to be pushed into a new gentler direction. We’ve listened to the concerns of the public and now is the time to act. Doctor Mengele is the perfect vehicle to drive our heath serviceĀ  along on its new journey.’

The new Health Secretary wasn’t available for comment but sources say he’s ‘keen to get straight to work’ and has ‘many innovative ways in which to reduce hospital waiting times.’

More to follow.

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