How are Daily Express readers going to blame 4,600 Rolls-Royce job losses on Amazon?

“The High Street has been dyin for years, everyone shops online nowadays. If you want a new Trent 1000 engine you just order it off Amazon innit.”

In a week where 99p Planet couldn’t afford to bail out Poundworld because they were a penny shy, Rolls-Royce have announced 4,600 job losses over the next two years.

Now I’m not saying it’s because of Brexit, but it’s because of fucking Brexit, although I can already picture the Tory spin now;

“Fewer people will be travelling to and from Europe, which means fewer aeroplanes and therefor less Rolls Royce engines will be needed, it makes perfect economic sense. Besides, we need an estimated 4,500 strawberry pickers so it really is win win.”

I don’t know what the comments section of The Daily Express will look like though, as those flag clad, dragon destroying, vacant petri dishes appear to blame everything on Amazon.

I’m guessing something like this:

“Jus waiting for all the remoaners lol! Its nuffink to do wiv Brexit ffs!

“The High Street has been dyin for years, everyone shops online nowadays. If you want a new Trent 1000 engine you just order it off Amazon innit.”

To be fair maybe it’s nothing to with Brexit. Maybe all these job losses, store closures and head office relocations are all just massive coincidences.

I’m sure as soon as we’ve left the EU they’ll all come begging with their tales between their legs for a crack at our post Brexit utopia.

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